Children, like a blank piece of paper, know nothing about the colourful world around them. Thus, they tend to ask a lot of questions to understand this world better. Some questions are easy, some are hard. Some are even embarrassing to answer! One question that most parents find it scary to answer to is where do babies come from?
When will you start talking to your child about the birds and bees? Some would say, “We picked you up from the dustbin.” Some even explain the baby-carrying stork story. A better answer will be to tell the truth. But how do you phrase it so that your kids will understand without embarrassing everyone?
Here’s a model situation: Parents answer “They come from inside Mommy’s tummy.” And the child continues asking “How do they get there?” and parents reply with “There are seeds inside mommy, just like the seeds inside of fruits.” This could be the end of the conversation or it could continue on. In fact, honest answers are better as this will help to built trust between parents and their children.
By examining the questions of your children, parents can get to understand the level of answers the child wants to know. Feel free to tell them to wait while you think of a better answer if you’re not sure. Try not to beat around the bush too much but directly go to the facts as children with a better understanding will stop asking that same question. Try not to get too tension or formal but treat it as a normal daily conversation.
Be careful of the words or phrases that you use when explaining to them. For instance, common answers that babies come from your belly or stomach is wrong as babies in fact are formed at the uterus and nutrients are transferred to the baby via the umbilical cord from the mother. This can be described to them as a special organ in the mother’s body which is used to house the baby till it’s born. Using the wrong terms can frighten or give a wrong impression to your innocent young ones.
At the same time, parents must overcome their own fear. Parents tend to worry too much and imagine things when in fact there’s nothing to be worried of. The child is just asking out of curiosity and sooner or later, they will be taught about it in schools. Parents should feel happy as their child has a better observance as most children might not notice such things when they are young. Besides that, letting them know will protect them from harm as they know better to let strangers to their private parts.
Nobody will understand children better than their own parents and thus, parents would have to decide when is the right time to let them know. The main aim is to have the child feel comfortable about their sexuality. A right and carefully considered answer will help a great deal. Parents may seek help from parenting books should they have problems on this issue.